Lizziek8, my wife has that same feeling a lot, certain that everybody is watching her, waiting to see something to criticize, so it’s definitely not just you.

We are still trying to work out what places are ok for us to go to. The library is usually fine, but it is sometimes too easy to get overwhelmed by the sheer amount of choices there, wanting to check out all the books at once. Restaurants are further complicated by the fact that I am diabetic vegetarian, she is vegan, and we both have a handful of bizarre food allergies.

Parks are always nice when school is in session. Screaming kids are kept to a minimum that way.

I love sending good thoughts for people. Are you feeling it?

On a sensory level, it seems that other people are each in their own “bubbles” of protection/armor against the stimuli around them. I feel isolated, in that things that bother me aren’t considered significant or irritating to others: I have “bubble envy”.

Wish I weren’t as subject to the disturbances & distresses visited upon me by “mundane daily life”, as well as the overwhelming swirl of phenomena (sensory as well as social) when I’m out in public. I feel overly visible, “on display”, in a negative way, when I leave my home (yes, I admit I’m agoraphobic). Yet I also (paradoxical, but true) feel invisible, detached, disconnected from people in general, because they can’t perceive the “positive, valuable” internal/complex me, only a “negative” exterior/surface presentation. I feel both too vulnerable, subject to my environment, conspicuous-and also unable to breach the divide between my individual self & the rest of humanity, cut off from the strangers around me (“out of the loop”).

“Doing” activities is also an issue, because the things I enjoy are hard to quantify as “active”. I thrive on & am enthusiastic about what get called “passive” (physically inactive, based more on mental content) pursuits, such as reading, listening to music, writing in my offline journal, drawing, and sharing conversation with the few select individuals with whom I feel a kinship. People suggest I join a group in town, but I don’t have interest in those hobbies, nor do my tastes/preferences seem to overlap with those of many other people, at least not offline/locally.

Folks often describe themselves (for instance, at an online dating site I joined, to no avail) as “outdoorsy”, so I refer to myself as being “indoorsy”. Alas, somehow this fails to draw like-minded people to me (for affiliation, solidarity, companionship-all those things people derive from spending time & sharing experiences with those who affirm & appreciate each other).

Society/culture seem to venerate those who “do” (meaning visible, tangible, athletic behavior) far more than those who “be” (and I “be” more than I “do”). My virtues only appear in particular contexts, in relationship with someone.

I guess I’m fortunate in that sound is not one of the things that really sets me off. (Some sounds, some times, but not sound in general.) IOW, I couldn’t go out with big headphones on because it “would” make people really stare at me. I do find my MP3 player does discourage people from trying to talk to me, and that’s a blessing.

Dunno if it will help you but having darker glasses and earphones in helps me get around in public at times.

Ben, I happen to know that there is still a drive-in theatre in Ontario, it’s on (I think) 9th line in Oakville. Went past it once and was astounded to see it. Just googled and found this: http://www.5drivein.com/