Stop beating your head against the proverbial brick wall. Your bio family sound like a bunch of creeps. Thank goodness you were blessed with Aspergers so you are not like them.

Mucho hugs.

There are some people who see kindness as weakness. It isn’t, but they despise ‘softness.’
Maybe Boris hardened up and lost all her softness. Boris is obviously not strong enough to handle a friendly approach from a relative

I don’t know why she behaved the way she did, but it was unbelievably shockingly harsh.

I can identify with your innocence, because all the time that you were saying that maybe it was better to forget your family, I thought: ‘there might/must be just one sweet kind relative somewhere.’ I hoped. I hoped that you would find that person and you would feel happier because of it. I still hope.
I read that this sort of problem is enormously complex because children genuinely still love their parents despite the abuse. They genuinely want to protect the same parents who abused them. To some children the abuse is their only way of receiving attention from their parent/s. It sounds like your family are desperately trying to stop you opening up a can of worms.
But you might just have stopped the cycle of abuse: you speaking up might have stopped family members who had that same abusive inclination. Your speaking up forced them to consider that their children don’t always remain silent. I think that your strength in confronting your parents must have had a good impact.

Rachel, I hope that it’s just a matter of time that find someone in your family you can reminisce with. Please try and be patient, and give yourself a little breathing space from searching. You are a strong woman, and a kind woman. Don’t let their barbarity change your sweet nature.

Sorry you’re having such a difficult time. I never thought of it that way but you’re right. You ARE being bullied. Now I have to re-examine my in-laws behaviour towards my wife. Sometimes that’s bullying too – and it can’t be tolerated.

As to why. People bully anyone whom they feel they can have an advantage over. It’s used as a way to build oneself up, by knocking others down.

I’d like to say that there’s justice in this world for bullies but the truth is, there isn’t. The best you can do is remove yourself from their attention. It sounds like you’re doing just that.

If nothing else, you can at least feel happy about maintaining the higher moral ground.