Journeys with Autism

Archive for Making Art

My Second OT Visit

March 29, 2009 Rachel Making Art, Occupational Therapy, Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD), Sensory Processing Issues, Therapeutic Brushing, Vestibular System, Weighted Blankets, Weighted Vests

Note: For information about my first OT visit, see my previous post.

For my second appointment, I showed up slightly less of a wreck than I did at the first, but still in need of some grounding. This time, the OT used the Thumper, a big vibrating machine that she ran back and forth over my back. The vibration was so strong that I could feel it inside my ears. It was another piece of heaven.

Once I got more grounded, we talked about how the past week’s activities had gone and discussed new activities to try in the coming week.

Therapeutic Brushing
After hearing about my negative experience with the brushing, the OT agreed that I should discontinue it. Instead of the brushing, we tried using soft bean bags and tapping them on my arms and legs. It felt okay at the office, but when I tried it at home, it felt distinctly like hitting myself, which is a trigger. She had also mentioned that I might try using a soft fabric that I find comforting. I have tried using the velvet fabrics I have, and they feel okay on my arms, but I still resist the whole activity. Trauma stuff, I think. Anyway, I do what I can.

Drawing an Infinity Sign
When I told my OT how frustrated I felt drawing the infinity sign, she suggested that I just imagine a large one on the wall and track it with my eyes. I’ve been doing that every day, and it feels really great. I can actually move my eyes without moving my head! After 50 years of doing it the other way, that really amazes me. I even find myself playing around with the exercise at work. I’ll look at something, and then shift my eyes to another object without moving my head. Everyone is so busy looking at all the objects in the store that no one notices the strange woman in the linen department doing eye exercises.

Learning the Cross-Crawl
At this visit, my OT taught me something called a “cross crawl,” in which I lift my right hand and then use it to touch my upraised left knee, and then use my left hand to touch my upraised right knee. The point is to cross the center line in my body in order to get comfortable with the parts of my body working independently. I find this particular exercise very easy, as it reminds me of various karate exercises that also work with crossing the body’s center line.

Singing
After hearing that the vibrations from the Thumper felt like they were inside my ears, the OT told me to sing every day. She said the vibrations would help to activate and soothe my vestibular system, which controls balance and movement, and is based in the inner ear. I always sing when I work out anyway, so this has been an easy one to practice each day. I also want to relearn Torah cantillation. In fact, the book and a small keyboard have been sitting in my loft, beckoning me for months. I’m hoping to add cantillation to my OT routine at some point.

Proprioceptive Activities and Late-Night Snacking
As I mentioned in an earlier post, the propriocetive system provides information about the relative positions of the parts of the body. Engaging the proprioceptive system includes how we feel the joints in our body and the kind of pressure we put on them. The right amount of pressure is very soothing.

I find that I do a number of activities to engage the proprioceptive system, such as using a weighted blanket and weighted vests, bicycling, taking walks, doing my artwork, and fidgeting with whatever object is handy. I wondered whether my tendency to eat a lot before bedtime is also related to my need for proprioceptive activities. My OT said that chewing on things engages the joints in the jaw in a powerful way, which is why I like chewy, crunchy things at bedtime. I’m using them to calm myself down.

I don’t particularly like using food for this purpose on a regular basis, and she suggested that I try a different proprioceptive activity when I feel food cravings without being hungry. It’s going to take a while to work out of the habit of using food to calm myself at night, but the amount I eat seems to be diminishing as I do other activities. Last night, for instance, I spent some time doing my artwork and ended up eating a lot less than usual before bedtime.

When all is said and done, I’m enjoying the process of occupational therapy. Because of my executive dysfunction, I’m still having difficulty consistently working the exercises into my daily routine. But I’ll get there.

2009 by Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg

10 comments

The Fine Art of Perseveration

March 22, 2009 Rachel Making Art, Marriage, Perseveration, Visual/Spatial Skills

The word perseveration has been coming into my mind with great frequency these days. It’s a cool word, you know? The verb form, perseverate, sounds like some weird techno-version of persevere, except that the -ate tacked onto the end makes it sound like something you do with a Cuisinart.

Anyway, I became curious as to what the authorities think perseveration means, so I went to the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary and looked it up. Check out the definition and etymology:

Main Entry: per·sev·er·a·tion
Pronunciation: \pər-ˌse-və-ˈrā-shən\
Function: noun
Etymology: Latin perseveration-, perseveratio, from perseverare
Date: 1910
Definition: continuation of something (as repetition of a word) usually to an exceptional degree or beyond a desired point
— per·sev·er·ate \-ˈse-və-ˌrāt\ intransitive verb
— per·sev·er·a·tive \-ˌrā-tiv\ adjective

I have read that people on the spectrum perseverate about things large and small, and I’m no exception. I’ve had therapists, boyfriends, schoolmates, and family all tell me that I think about things for far too long and that I need to give things a rest. Of course, it’s never seemed like too long to me. Having all those thoughts constantly spinning in my brain, like a hamster on a wheel, has always felt perfectly normal to me. But then again, in the words of a Paul Simon song, “When something’s wrong, I’m always the first to admit it, and always the last to know.”

Not that anything is wrong with perseverating, unless you’re driving the other people in your house nuts with it. That’s where continuing a process “beyond a desired point” gets people tense. Lately, I’ve been watching myself perseverate, and for me, it’s been great fun. My husband doesn’t much mind either, except when I say, “I’ll be right there to watch the movie,” and an hour later, I’m still working on whatever-it-is that really, truly, I-mean-it was only supposed to take a few more minutes to finish.

My main warning sign that I’m about to go on a roll comes very early in the game. It usually starts with a “nudge-nudge, wink-wink” of denial, as in, “I’ve got this great idea for a new mobile, and I’m just going to wind the beads around one spoon before coming downstairs and finishing breakfast.” Yeah, right. Several hours later, I’m still working on the mobile and haven’t had anything to eat or drink at all.

Now, I know better than to start when I have a commitment outside my house in the early afternoon. I’ve set up my schedule to start my volunteer work at 1 pm, which means that I need to eat, drink water, work out, drink more water, shower, dress, and generally take care of myself before going out into the world. If it’s a week that my daughter is with me, I can stave off the perseveration even without an outside commitment, because her schedule gives me a schedule, and thus a break from my own extremely focused process.

But if my daughter is at her father’s house, my husband is visiting his dad, and I’m not working outside my house, I’ve got the green light to go. I get so absolutely lost in whatever I’m doing that I couldn’t tell you whether five minutes have passed or five hours.

Lately, when I have time to myself, I’ve been perseverating with my art. I love trying things out, and seeing how they look, and taking things apart when they don’t work, and trying something new, and seeing how to do a task that’s been stumping me. I love the feeling of the beads in my hands. I love wrapping the wires to get them to coil just right. I even love the nicks and the callouses I’m getting on my fingers. I love the whole blessed thing.

When I’m alone and can let the art take me where it wants me to go, I find that perseverating doesn’t happen “beyond a desired point,” because there is no desired point. At those times, it’s the “continuation of something…to an exceptional degree.” It’s better than persevering. It’s persevering by letting go and letting the process take me where it will. It’s persevering with inspiration.

However, nothing exists in isolation from its opposite. So while perseverating on my art feels wonderful, having to stop for any reason is very, very difficult. Sometimes, it feels painful. Perseverating is physical, like a powerful force that doesn’t want to stop. Something has to interpose itself between me and the object of my perseveration. Sometimes, an external commitment, like a doctor’s appointment, will do it. At other times, it’s my internal moral compass telling me that I can’t keep my family waiting endlessly for dinner or for a movie.

There are forces equal to perseveration, and being an adult, I can choose to stop and shift my attention. I love spending time with my husband and daughter. I know that nothing lasts forever, that my daughter will soon be grown, that my husband and I are getting older, and that I’d better pay attention now, because one day, everything will be changed. Growing older provides perspective, and I am glad of that.

It’s the transition from one activity to another that is difficult for me. I even have difficulty saying good-bye to the day and going to sleep, no matter how tired I am. It’s my Aspie wiring. I can talk my way around it and adjust my life around it, but I can’t ever change it.

And why would I want to? As difficult as it is, it makes me who I am. And I’m enjoying who I am, more and more, with every passing day.

8 comments

Creating More Art from Found Objects

March 19, 2009 Rachel Making Art, Visual/Spatial Skills

Since I last posted about making art from found objects, I’ve completed the crown I was working on, and I made another mobile.

For the crown, I added some color and texture to the four wires on top. I used a couple of bracelets and a beaded necklace, winding them around each portion of the wires. Here’s how the crown looks hanging in the window:

Yesterday, I made a new mobile from some pieces I’d picked up at the thrift store. We have a “World-Famous 25-Cent Shelf,” on which you can find all manner of miscellaneous items for a quarter apiece. Here’s how the mobile looks:

The circular metal at the top and the spiral in the center came from the 25-cent shelf. I put some blue beads onto the spiral, wrapped some wires around a thin tube to make them squiggly, and then hung three wind chimes from them. Through the center of the spiral, I suspended a Zuni ring I had bought in New Mexico in 1987. In the circle at the top, I hung a piece of white quartz I’d found at the store.

Today at work, I picked up some more items from the 25-cent shelf, mostly odd and interesting pieces of metal that I can use for the frames of my art work. Then, to my heart’s delight, I found out about a box of metal items in the sorting room.

All the metal was going out for salvage, and I could take anything I wanted, for free. I ended up with several white wire hangers (that I can take apart and mold for wiring), a whisk, some small spoons, and a bottle opener. They will all get turned into art, eventually.

I’m really looking forward to tag sale season. Around here, after tag sales, people leave all the stuff that didn’t get sold in boxes by the sidewalk. There will be more free stuff to salvage and use. My basic rule for the items that make up my art work is that they be used (rather than new), and that they be free, or cost a dollar or less. It’s extraordinary what you can find.

One comment

Creating Art from Found Objects

March 15, 2009 Rachel Making Art, Sensory Processing Issues, Visual/Spatial Skills

Some years ago, I visited a woman who made art from found objects. In her medicine cabinet, she had rows of different colored bottles with marbles on top. Sitting on her shelves and hanging on her walls were beautiful, colorful, sparkly creations. Everywhere I looked, I saw art made from objects that had been lost, thrown away, or forgotten by other people.

Friday morning, I was thinking about this woman on my way to the library, daydreaming about how fun it would be to make art objects like she did. As I was walking along, I looked down, and there on the ground was a small, beautiful beaded earring! So I picked it up and realized that I had begun. On my way home, I bought some wire and a pair of wire cutters at the hardware store and started getting excited about all the things I could make.

Later, I gathered some old beaded decorations that my daughter and I had made long ago. They were all tangled up and packed in a box in our garage. While I was there, I noticed a small organizer box with clear plastic drawers. We’d found it at the transfer station a couple of years ago, but had never used it. After I brought the box and the beads into the house, I started collecting old spoons we no longer use and some earrings, rings, and bracelets I no longer wear. After several trips, I got everything into my loft, where I spent a good hour or two unstringing the beads and organizing everything into the little drawers. Such bliss!

On Saturday morning, I woke up before dawn, thinking about what to make out of everything and how to go about it. I couldn’t shake all my ideas and go back to sleep, so I went up to my loft and began. I love hanging objects, especially mobiles and wind chimes, so I started making a mobile. Several hours later, here was my first creation:

The colors sparkle in the sunlight from my skylight, and when you spin it, the spoons all splay outward to very nice effect:

After taking a walk, I decided to make a second mobile. This one was made from two ankle bracelets my daughter had given me, a charm bracelet, several old pairs of earrings, the earring I found yesterday (of course), and a really cool marble pendant. I was going for the effect of a crown. The piece might be finished at this stage, but I’m not sure. I’m thinking that I might add something to the wires on top:

Working with my hands seems to bring all my senses into harmony. I felt great yesterday, just as I did last Sunday, when Bob and I made the hamentashen and rugelach. I felt grounded in my body, with a fullness of energy and happiness that I haven’t felt since I was a kid.

Maybe I should skip the OT visits and just do art? (Kidding. My first appointment is tomorrow.

© 2009 by Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg

6 comments

Sewing, Knitting, and Baking–Such Fun!

March 8, 2009 Rachel Baking, Fiber Art, Food, Happiness, Judaism and Jewish Life, Making Art, Visual/Spatial Skills

I’ve been having so much fun lately working with my hands. It gives me such a sense of balance and well-being.

Until last week, it had been a long time since I’d done any sewing. My last major sewing project had been a baby blanket I’d designed and sewn by hand when my 16-year-old was an infant. But more recently, I’d had a dress hanging in my closet for a few years, and while I loved the material—a beautiful Guatemalan cotton print—the dress itself had never really suited me. It was a winter dress, with long sleeves, and not all that comfortable. I think I wore it once.

So last week, I realized that it was really okay to take the dress apart and make something else with the fabric. I’m completely in love with Guatemalan fabrics and patterns, so I decided to make something I’d get to look at on a regular basis. But what to make?

Well, first I took one of the panels from the long part of the dress and sewed it into a simple bag. I used the ties that were on the waist of the dress for the over-the-shoulder strap. Here’s how it came out:

Then, I decided to make a skirt from the remaining panels. I think it came out quite well:

I’ve still got some material left. I’m thinking that I’ll save it for making some sort of mobile. Perhaps a set of stars? Not sure, yet.

I’ve also been keeping up with my knitting. Several weeks ago, I bought a knitted 100% silk scarf at the thrift store for $6.00. It was really long, and I figured I’d unravel it and make something out of it. When I got it home, I noticed that it had a mildewy smell, as though it had been in a damp basement for several years. So, I put it through a gentle cycle and then laid it on a towel on top of the radiator to dry. The next morning, I unraveled the scarf and got a giant ball of yarn. The mildewy smell was entirely gone, and about half the ball of yarn became a very soft, fuzzy hat:

I’ve also made some good progress on my sweater project. I’ve got the front and back completed, as you can see:

I’m also nearly finished with one of the sleeves. As soon as I get both sleeves done, I’m going to block the various pieces and then make some time to see Rachel at the yarn store for help with sewing it all together. I’m not really in a rush to get the sweater done before spring. At this point, making the sweater is as much about learning the skills needed as it is about making something to wear.

Today, I’ve put the fiber art aside because we have one of my favorite Jewish holidays coming up: Purim, which begins on Monday night. (If you don’t know about Purim, you can find some good, basic information here. The page even includes a gluten-free recipe!)

In our family, we bake special Purim treats—hamentashen and rugelach—to give to our friends and neighbors. So today, my husband and I spent the afternoon baking. It was a beautiful sunny day outside, and the treats in the oven smelled so delicious! We made a variety of hamentashen, using apricot jelly, raspberry preserves, apple cider jelly, and chocolate chips as filling. Here’s how they look:

We also made two different kinds of rugelach. First, we made the walnut-raisin-cinnamon kind:

Then, we made the chocolate chip kind:

They smell and taste as good as they look!

5 comments

More Fiber Art

January 31, 2009 Rachel Fiber Art, Making Art, Visual/Spatial Skills

A few weeks ago, I signed up to take a sweater class at the local yarn store. At the last minute, I realized that I would have a hard time concentrating in a class while learning a new skill. I emailed the store owner (another woman named Rachel) and explained a little bit about my sensory integration difficulties. I asked whether I could arrange some private lessons with her instead of taking the class. She was happy to do it and said she wouldn’t charge me more than I’d already paid in advance.

So I chose a sweater pattern from a book I have at home and went to the store to buy some yarn. I ended up with eight skeins of a beautiful rust-colored Malabrigo yarn from Uruguay. Not only did I get the yarn, but Rachel also sat me down, unwound three of the skeins for me, and helped me get started on the sweater itself.

I would like to say that the sweater is done, but I’ve gone off in several different directions since I got the yarn. I’ve started the sweater, but I’ve also made two more scarves, a hat, and my very first pair of mittens.

Using more of the yarn that my husband spun from the fleece of our late sheep Sophie, I made myself a simple scarf to go with my first color stranding hat:

I then took the wool from an old hat that I’d made a couple of years back and turned it into a torquoise scarf to go with my two teal and purple hats:

I hadn’t made a hat for awhile, so I decided to reaquaint myself with circular needles. I ended up making a chenille hat from some scraps of yarn I got at a local thrift store. Here’s the hat, along with a scarf that I made a couple of years ago:

After I’d finished the scarves and the hat, my daughter asked me to make her a pair of mittens. I was going to ask Rachel to teach me, but I decided to try a pattern I have at home and see whether I could figure it out. Lo and behold, I did!

These are the first knitted items I’ve ever made entirely on double-pointed needles. I used some specialty yarn I’d picked up at the store where I volunteer. It was very fuzzy, which made it difficult to work with. If I dropped a stitch, for example, it was very hard to see where it had gone, so I had to improvise. On the positive side, the yarn was so fuzzy that most of my mistakes blended right in.

So much for my latest creations! Since I lost my original quilt photos when I ported to the new template, I thought I’d post pictures of the two quilts I’ve made. With all the snow on the ground, it’s been very nice to have them in the house.

I’ll post a photo of the sweater when it’s done. Hopefully, I’ll have the sweater finished before spring!

10 comments

My Fiber Art

December 29, 2008 Rachel Fiber Art, Making Art, Visual/Spatial Skills

Several people have asked to see some of my knitted creations, so I’m posting some of my favorites. All were made with locally spun wool.

This hat was the first I ever made using color stranding. I wear it every winter morning when I first get up.

This hat is one of my original designs. When I finished it, I found that I had made the brim far too long, so I folded it up into the hat for extra warmth.

And here’s another original. Can you tell that I like purple and teal, especially together?

Here is a cable-knit scarf that I made for my husband from homespun wool. We used to live on a small farm with sheep, goats, and chickens. The wool came from our sheep Sophie, who passed away last winter. My husband carded her fleece and spun it with a drop spindle. This was my first experience of knitting with homespun, and I loved it. The yarn is very soft, and there is still some lanolin in the fiber. It was very interesting to see how the yarn changed color, from white to gray to reddish brown, as I went along.